welcome to genvibe
The starter relay is on the top side of the under dash fuse block, can get to it by pulling the storage bin left of the steering wheel. or maybe also yank out the vent/mirror control trim piece. see the pictures in
viewtopic.php?t=32849 As a test, looks like you could try swapping it with the DEF relay next to it (in that pic, swap the blue and pink relays, yours may be different colors)
if its not the starter relay, it could be a number of other things
starter
ignition switch
bad or corroded battery terminals
AM2 fuse
park/neutral switch on the tranny (or clutch pedal switch if manual)
bad ground wire
When you turn the key to start, do the lights dim, any audible clicks?