Funny Joke

[Bowlsie]

I am sure some of u have seen this. It's new to me though so I thought I would share:A mother and her son were flying Southwest Airlines from Kansas City to Chicago. The son (who had been looking out the window) turned to his mother and asked, "If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?" The mother (who couldn't think of an answer) told her son to ask the stewardess. So the boy asked the stewardess, "If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?" The stewardess responded, "Did your mother tell you to ask me?" The boy said, "yes she did". "Well, then, tell your mother that there are no baby planes because Southwest always pulls out on time. Have your mother explain that to you."

[Triton]

That is very funny! Thanks.

[GT_03]

That's a new one to me too,

[joatmon]

that's a good one.ethnic stereotype warning, rasermon, is this one ok?an irish guy goes into a bar and orders "Three pints of Guiness if you please". He takes them and sits at a table. He drinks once from the first and puts it down, takes a drink from the second, and then the third. Makes the rounds between all three until they're all gone, and orders "Three pints of Guiness if you please.". The bartender says "You knowif you order them one at a time, then each will be fresh." Theman says "I have two brothers, one's back home in Ireland, the other's in Australia, and I'm here in america. We're very close, so each Saturday at this time, we each go into a bar and do this. They are in bars right now doing the same thing. It's a way for us to stay close even though we're so far apart."The bartender thinks this is a cool custom and gives him beers in sets of three. Every Saturday for a year and half, the guy goes into the samebar at the same time and repeats the ritual, a drink from each of the three in succession. Then one Saturday, he goes in and orders "Two pints of Guiness if you please" The bar goes silent as he sits and starts taking turns from the two pints because they all know his custom and figure something tragic must have happended to one of the brothers. The bartender goes over to him and says "I'm so sorry to hear of your loss." The man is confused, but then understands and says "oh no, you've got it wrong, they're fine, they're both fine. It's just that I've given up drinking"

[Big_Red]

funny

[rasermon]

HeeHee!

[joatmon]

Bowlsie, didn't mean to usurp your joke (which is still funny), thought it would be a good thread to just add jokes to, but either nobody else thought so or nobody else knew anything that would qualify as a 'funny joke" --------There's an Air Force guy driving from McChord to Ft Lewis, and an Army guydriving from Ft Lewis to McChord. In the middle of the night with noother cars on the road they hit each other head on and both cars go flyingoff in different directions. The Air Force guy manages to climb out ofhis car and surveys the damage. He looks at his twisted car and says,"Man, I am really lucky to be alive!" Likewise the Army guy scrambles out of his car and looks at his wreckage. He too says to himself, "I can't believe I survived this wreck!" The Army guy walks over to the Air Force guy and says, "Hey man, I thinkthis is a sign from God that we should put away our petty differences andlive as friends instead of archrivals." The Air Force guy thinks for a moment and says, "You know, you'reabsolutely right! We should be friends. Now I'm gonna see what elsesurvived this wreck." So the Air Force guy pops open his trunk and findsa full, unopened bottle of Jack Daniels. He says to the Army guy, "I thinkthis is another sign from God that we should toast to our new foundunderstanding and friendship." The Army guy says, "You're damn right!" and he grabs the bottle and startssucking down Jack Daniels. After putting away nearly half the bottle theArmy guy hands it back to the Air Force guy and says, "Your turn!" The Air Force guy twists the cap back on the bottle and says, "Nahh, Ithink I'll wait for the cops to show up." ---------

[ragingfish]

Ironically, I received that same joke the other day, but instead of an air force guy and an army guy, it's a woman and man, and the man drinks half the bottle...

[Hot Vibe]

A professor of mathematics sent a fax to his wife. It read: "Dear wife, you must realize that you are 54 years old, and I have certain needs you are no longer able to satisfy. I am otherwisehappy with you as a wife, and I sincerely hope you will not be hurt or offended to learn that by the time you receive this, I will be at the Grand Hotel with my 18 year old teaching assistant. I'll be home before midnight."When he arrived at the hotel, there was a faxed letter waitingfor him that read as follows: "Dear husband, you too, are 54 years old, and by the time you receive this letter, I willbe at the Breakwater Hotel with the18 year old pool boy. Being the brilliant mathematician you are, you can easily appreciate the fact that 18 goes into 54 a lot more times than 54 goes into 18. Don't wait up."

[ZedTim]

old but still funny

[drunkenmaxx]

a lawyer, a priest, and a teacher are all on a boat that is sinking. the teacher, being kind and warmhearted, says "we should save the children first!" The lawyer says "F&$# the children", then the priest stops scratches his head, then says "do you think we have time?"

[fire_502]

If that's what you're worried about going to hell for, then you're a much better Catholic than I, my friend!

[Bowlsie]

Hey no prob man. Your joke was funny as hell.

[joatmon]

Two sweet robins were sitting in a tree. "I'm hungry," said the first one. "Me too" said the second. "Let's fly down and find some lunch." They found a field filled with delicious worms. They ate and ate until they could eat no more. "I'm so full," said the first, " that I can't fly back to the tree.""Well, then let's just relax in the sun for awhile," said the second. As they lay napping, a big fat cat snuck up and gobbled the two of them. He smiled, burped, and said ........."I just love Baskin' Robins!"