Do you Fart in your Vibe?

Flip-Side · Post by **Flip-Side** » Sat Oct 05, 2002 3:01 pm

Whenever I was in my old Saturn, I would gladly cut loose. But in my Vibe I find myself hesitant...almost afraid...to fart inside it. Whenever I go over speed bumps, I slow way down so as not one "Fweep" escapes my well-shaped cheeks. Anyone else have this same fear? Why does this car control me so?!

old man winter · Post by **old man winter** » Sun Oct 06, 2002 12:30 am

I fart all the time, it is my signature. Without going into allot of detatil I have had several surguries because of my bad guts. Due to the removal of 6' of my small intestine, and other thing I can't remember, I breark wind all day. The level on the reakter scale depends on what I ingest...................mmmmm brussel sprouts.

d_m_kolb · Post by **d_m_kolb** » Sun Oct 06, 2002 4:09 am

I'm leaving! Something stinks in here.

cohocarl · Post by **cohocarl** » Mon Oct 07, 2002 6:24 pm

I never thought of it, but if we hit the air recirculation button, we could savor it a little longer....

old man winter · Post by **old man winter** » Mon Oct 07, 2002 7:38 pm

That is way too funny.............do you play the fart game? Does the Vibe get a little campy on the way back from a weekend out in the wilds.

Flip-Side · Post by **Flip-Side** » Tue Oct 08, 2002 1:30 pm

I am surprised there are so few people on this forum that are secure with their flatulance. I know everyone out here must have an opinion on the subject.Yeah...go on...just read for the hilarity of it all and don't share the warmth...er...I mean luv

cohocarl · Post by **cohocarl** » Tue Oct 08, 2002 5:28 pm

quote:I am surprised there are so few people on this forum that are secure with their flatulanceI bet there's alot of "closet farters" out there.......hey wait, there's another idea!!

old man winter · Post by **old man winter** » Mon Oct 14, 2002 10:05 am

I stunk up the WRX this weekend..............all that turkey and fixens made for a bad gut. I did this on the way to my brother in-laws camp on Belwood Lake, this ones a top ten I thought to myself. I also dropped a bomb in the camp and drove eveyone out for air. When I jumped back into the WRX I got a reminder of the good one. Some of It got into the seat fabric and puffed out when I got back in the car. You can store your farts for future enjoyment with the right material in your seats.............I wonder if leather works good.

Vibe · Post by **Vibe** » Mon Oct 14, 2002 4:39 pm

HEY!!!!!We all do --but won't admit it.. But the other day while going to the vet my cat S**T in the cargo area.Ever try to drive with that smell cause you can't put the windows down for fear she will jump out. LONGEST 2 miles I ever drove. Sorry but I had to share this bit of humor. James

old man winter · Post by **old man winter** » Wed Oct 16, 2002 10:10 am

Hey Dean,I see you are a Homer fan............did you get a box of the new Kellogs Homer.....................mmmmmm donuts. I wonder if they make you fart.

Flip-Side · Post by **Flip-Side** » Sun Nov 03, 2002 7:13 am

Yeah, Homer Rules! My wife has been getting upset with me, so I've adjustem my diet accordingly. Just tired of sleeping on the couch. I'm sorry, but when one is brewing I have the unbearable urge to pull the covers over her head, I laugh SO hard. I believe that manuever is called, "The Dutch Oven".

old man winter · Post by **old man winter** » Sun Nov 03, 2002 10:24 am

Man...I don't do that any more, I'm in the dog house for a week. I could gat away with that 8 years ago, but not now.

Vibe Rater · Post by **Vibe Rater** » Sun Nov 03, 2002 11:16 am

Do I fart!? LOL. Is the Pope a catholic?

Flip-Side · Post by **Flip-Side** » Mon Jun 02, 2003 2:14 pm

quote:Do I fart!? LOL. Is the Pope a catholic?Yeah....but does he fart in the Pope-Mobile. That glass enclosure must get pretty nappy after just once.

meathead333 · Post by **meathead333** » Mon Jun 02, 2003 3:01 pm

i do, i figure i have a moon roof now, that makes an extra window. so i can air out the nasy one even faster. then again, my vibe makes that rotten egg smell now and then, that really stinks!

Pablo1669 · Post by **Pablo1669** » Mon Jun 02, 2003 9:45 pm

I fart like crazy in the car (and pretty much everywhere else too).... and after a long night of drinkin beer, I'll take like 3 friends home in the morning, and Labatt's Blue gives me the worst farts ever... God, I love that window lock feature, but I don't know why everyone else doesn't.Who said something about the fart game? Have you ever seen "Delerious" by Eddie Murphy from like the 1980's?

Triton · Post by **Triton** » Mon Jun 02, 2003 11:21 pm

I try not to fart in the Vibe. Don't get me wrong, I like to fart as much as the next guy (or girl - admit it ladies, you do it too) but I don't want the smell getting all up in the upholstrey! LOL!My 13 y/o stepson did a couple of weeks ago and I got on him about it. It is a lot different if you fart in the car and you are by yourself. But when others are in the car, I don't want to make any else suffer or be a victim of someone elses funk!

Triton · Post by **Triton** » Tue Jun 03, 2003 12:01 am

quote:I've been the victim of too many Dutch Ovens, when I get the opportunity to warm the blankets, and get revenge, I do my best !I haven't heard the term "Dutch Oven" in a while! That is messed up and really funny at the same time. I can tell you that I would never do that to my wife...she would kill me!

Flip-Side · Post by **Flip-Side** » Tue Jun 03, 2003 3:10 am

quote:God, I love that window lock feature, but I don't know why everyone else doesn't.Haha. Yeah...the scrammble for the window button, and then the panic that ensues when it doesn't open. I love my car.I almost busted a lung laughing at everyones posted "nuggets of wisdom". . I'm greek....so is it still considered a "Dutch Oven"? My wife will kick me out of bed if I do it anymore, or simply out-blast me.

Triton · Post by **Triton** » Tue Jun 03, 2003 3:16 am

quote:I'm greek....so is it still considered a "Dutch Oven"?Yes. I'm mexican and I still consider it a Dutch Oven! LOL!

Pablo1669 · Post by **Pablo1669** » Tue Jun 03, 2003 4:08 am

quote:Haha. Yeah...the scrammble for the window button, and then the panic that ensues when it doesn't open. I love my car.About 3 people from the office came over to see what I was laughing at when I read that. I love the mad scrammble as well. I usually get hit in the arm about 3 times until I finally turn off the window lock.

rasermon · Post by **rasermon** » Tue Jun 03, 2003 5:20 am

I will admit it that I do break wind in my vibe. It was a couple weeks ago went out to dinner at our local Mexican restaurant and had some enchiladas topped with tejano salsa. After that we came home and I washed it down with some Papst Blue Ribbon and settled down and went to bed. That combination of food and beer had about 7 hours to ferment in my system and was ready for the next day. Yes, the window lock feature can be your best friend and that day my wife wasn't.

ColonelPanic · Post by **ColonelPanic** » Tue Jun 03, 2003 1:35 pm

LOL!Ya know, we can fart and get away with it... DUDE, DID YOU FART!!!???No way man, that's just the catalytic converter or something.

Flip-Side · Post by **Flip-Side** » Wed Oct 29, 2003 10:21 am

quote:enchiladastejano salsaPapst Blue RibbonThat combination of food and beer had about 7 hours to ferment in my system and was ready for the next day. Yes, the window lock feature can be your best friend and that day my wife wasn't. Oh the humanity! Mexican and Pabst!? You are bolder than I, my friend. At least I have seat covers now though. I got em at SAMS Club for $20 and they are actually pretty decent. For those who don't know though, neoprene seat covers don't breath or allow moisture through. The neoprene fabric deflects not only your body heat, but the smell of your farts as well. Take this to heart before purchasing, because my farts are deflected away from my seat, and into a path which will violate my passengers. For those of you that are surprised at the thought and time I put into this subject....no. I am not crazy. Just a man baby. Just a man.

drunkenmaxx · Post by **drunkenmaxx** » Wed Oct 29, 2003 10:06 pm

i like when noone knows you farted, you just let it slowly waft to their nose. a good idea to increase the nastyness would be to turn the heat on the floor and let it get nice and toasty before you let 'er rip, this will perculate the fart, thus increasing it's potency.

rasermon · Post by **rasermon** » Wed Oct 29, 2003 10:29 pm

quote:i like when noone knows you farted, you just let it slowly waft to their nose. a good idea to increase the nastyness would be to turn the heat on the floor and let it get nice and toasty before you let 'er rip, this will perculate the fart, thus increasing it's potency.That is a "SBD".

drunkenmaxx · Post by **drunkenmaxx** » Wed Oct 29, 2003 11:15 pm

quote:That is a "SBD". man, that term takes me back to the days...

drunkenmaxx · Post by **drunkenmaxx** » Wed Oct 29, 2003 11:34 pm

on the elevator! i was going to college one day, my girlfriend and i were taking the elevator to floor 1 from the basement. there was another guy in the elevator who was getting off at 2. well, since everyday, for me, is a recovery from the day before, i had some good stuff to present to our fellow passenger. i pulled out all stops and let the SBD rip. about 30 seconds later, my girlfriend gave me the "i can't believe you farted" eyes and i smile at her. well, we got to our floor and got out, and the guy who was going to 2 got out with the quickness and took the stairs to 2. i was proud.

Reynoma · Post by **Reynoma** » Thu Oct 30, 2003 1:12 am

Now I know what drunken's hippo is doing. Wafting a fart!I don't think I've ever seen a posting grow so quickly.

Flip-Side · Post by **Flip-Side** » Thu Oct 30, 2003 2:09 am

quote:if they look around you look around also and do a facial reaction of someone who doesn't know who farted!!!Thats the same tactic I use in the mens room. The urinals will be lined with people, and I let one go. If looks get shot my way, I look over toward the guy next to me with a serious expression.My absolute favorite though, is the "Vapor Eddy". You wait till someone is walking past, behind you, and you let one go in their path. The air eddys behind them will pull the fart along with them. When they stop, they won't know where the heck it came from, and you come out smelling like a rose.

Reynoma · Post by **Reynoma** » Thu Oct 30, 2003 2:52 am

There should be an entire scientific community around this topic. Maybe even a trade journal.

micheles_bad_vibe · Post by **micheles_bad_vibe** » Thu Oct 30, 2003 9:01 am

canadavibegt · Post by **canadavibegt** » Sun Nov 02, 2003 7:27 am

Mmmmmm bed time farts..... just gets me in the mood thinking about it.... LOLNever realy got the whole humour in doing that......And I think the Dutch may have invented it but Canadians perfected the art of farting

Flip-Side · Post by **Flip-Side** » Mon Nov 03, 2003 5:39 am

quote:And I think the Dutch may have invented it but Canadians perfected the art of farting Man I gotta agree with that. Labatt Blue does things to my digestive track that boggles the mind. My vibe has thanked me since switching to Coors Light.

Pablo1669 · Post by **Pablo1669** » Wed Nov 05, 2003 11:53 pm

quote:Man I gotta agree with that. Labatt Blue does things to my digestive track that boggles the mind. I agree 100%. I switched to Michelob Light though as it does not give me such terrible gas as that canadian stuff didAlso, way to resurect this thread whoever that was, this is funny stuff

drunkenmaxx · Post by **drunkenmaxx** » Thu Nov 06, 2003 2:03 am

my good ol' busch gives me hella wind. the sulphur smell is almost enjoyable

Flip-Side · Post by **Flip-Side** » Mon Nov 10, 2003 4:21 am

quote:i was proud.Hahahaha! Man...it's those last statements in your posts that get me rolling DrunkenVibe. It's funny because it's the truth, not because it was something you planned, you know?

drunkenmaxx · Post by **drunkenmaxx** » Mon Nov 10, 2003 4:35 am

exactamundo! i love how a fart is one of the only things that can make me laugh out loud when i am by myself. i like how people can feel it through the floor if you are on the second floor or have a basement or crawlspace. the worst is having this damn cubicle, thinking noones around and letting her rip, then, just at that moment, one of the lovely ladies from customer service comes along to discuss a job. there is no hiding the obvious

rasermon · Post by **rasermon** » Mon Nov 10, 2003 6:20 am

quote:my good ol' busch gives me hella wind. the sulphur smell is almost enjoyabledrunkenvibe, pick yourself up a large onion ring from Burger King was wash it down with some Busch. Let it ferment for 5-7 hrs. Enjoy the next say.

Flip-Side · Post by **Flip-Side** » Mon Nov 10, 2003 7:17 am

quote:the worst is having this damn cubicle, thinking noones around and letting her rip, then, just at that moment, one of the lovely ladies from customer service comes along to discuss a job. there is no hiding the obvious Boy oh boy, can I relate. When I get a call that one of my systems aren't operating right on an aircraft, I have to go up to the flight deck to see whats up. After wearing waterproof Gor-Tex coat and pants for hours, any farts from the past half-hour or so get stored and multiplied, usually for only my own enjoyment. But when I lean over the controls and indicators to see what the Crews' issues are, all that is stored up gets "poofed" out of my coat. Sometimes around attractive females, wanting to know what is wrong, and they turn and leave before they can finish asking. Oh the shame. Oh yeah. The air is constantly re-circulated, so there is no escape.

Big_Red · Post by **Big_Red** » Tue Nov 11, 2003 12:07 am

You know it's post whoring when people can spend 3 pages talking about farts. as for myself....since we are on the topic, yes, I do let one go....but that is what we have Fabreeze for. Fart and spray.

drunkenmaxx · Post by **drunkenmaxx** » Tue Nov 11, 2003 12:25 am

when i was young, we would run and find the most optimum farting surface (ie-lanolium or wood floor) and sit on it for optimal performance, like adding a cai to your (removed). sometimes just pressing against a door would suffice as well, this is reccomended when someone is in a room and you feel like giving them a good laugh as well.

c17il3 · Post by **c17il3** » Tue Nov 11, 2003 12:43 am

Try being lactose intolerant. Talking about nasty and painful. I do fart in my vibe and the wife yells but she likes to do it to. The best enjoyment I get out of farting is going onto the flight deck of the C17 while the pilots are locked into their seats and cant move about. Aah the power of milk .

Flip-Side · Post by **Flip-Side** » Tue Nov 11, 2003 1:43 am

C17's...in Oklahoma? Oh yeah...Altus. Know some guys who had to pcs there. Ahhh and you are right...there is no escape. Its like a fart-cave on those flight decks. You gotta be a ninja to escape, or batman.

MailGuy! · Post by **MailGuy!** » Thu Mar 25, 2004 2:36 am

Thanks to sherry2 for her Jurrasic fart post in the humor section. On that subject I thought I would bring this thread back to life (because it makes me laugh so hard scrooling through it) and give my 2 cents.Can't fart in the Vibe. It holds the smell too long. Let one loose once shortly before shutting the car off starting my day of work. Guess what was waiting for me at the end of the day...

noginsk · Post by **noginsk** » Thu Mar 25, 2004 2:54 am

I haven't been a member for very long and so I missed the opportunity to read this the first time through. I'm glad I don't have any neighbors nearby because I started laughing so loudly. As for me, I am proud of a very important job-well-done. My wife tends to be very prim and proper and guess what? I managed to break her to farting. In fact,I managed to break her to it so well that she by far takes the cake in any farting contest we have. Yeah, she takes the cake, ingests it, REALLY works it in her intestine, then lets it rip over and over and over and over.... I've created Frankenfart. Boy I hope she doesn't read this...

drummerdude · Post by **drummerdude** » Thu Mar 25, 2004 3:10 am

the best one was when he lit his fart in the backseat with 2 girls on eitherside of him me driving and another girl in the front.... they all cheered and clapped!!! we have way yoo much fun with methane, a lighter, and the vibe!!

Flip-Side · Post by **Flip-Side** » Fri Mar 26, 2004 6:56 am

Quote, originally posted by MailGuy! Â»Can't fart in the Vibe. It holds the smell too long. I hear that! I felt the need to expel some "weekend beer" farts on my monday leaving work. A few minutes later, I saw some of my co-workers walking to the burger king a mile down the road, whom had played some pranks on me at work (soaked/froze my hat in the freezer). I pulled over (surpressing a big grin) and they thanked me for stopping. They hopped in and I took off before they could get a whiff. Window lock on, and several circles around Burger King later, I let them out for some fresh air. Ahhhh, the look on their faces.

Mavrik · Post by **Mavrik** » Fri Mar 26, 2004 10:59 pm

Oh man if I wasn't dying of laughter, I would be from the stench of this thread!

MonotoneSatellite · Post by **MonotoneSatellite** » Sun Jul 18, 2004 11:30 pm

More methane fueled hilarity!http://www.thesneeze.com/mt-archives/000151.html