So ticked off

[Merzbow]

Well, after waiting two weeks for the "Mr.Grille" aluminum inserts I finally come home to the box sitting on my porch. My heart jumped with joy and I was extremely excited to get them in.I take them out and hold them up to the car to see how they look before putting them on. They looked beautiful! Theonly thing is that they attatch to teh stock grills with zip ties. They hodl in there snuggly and tight and fit perfectly though and the zip ties are not at all visable. Looks great!So my mom walks in and sees them and says "no, I don't like them they are going back" aparently they are not good enough quality to meet her standards. After two weeks of patiently waiting my happiness is shattered by her. Blah blah blah we start arguing since it was my own money I bought them with and I think they are awsome. So I gues according to her I can't buy anything for the car because she considers it a waste of money, that I could use to pay for the monthly payments....Seriously, I make $100 a paycheck every TWO WEEKS! Half of which I have to put in the bank. How can I ever afford to pay for the Vibe? She's the one that decided to buy this car, she cannot expect me to pay for it with such a small amount of income. It's like buying your wife a diamond ring and telling her to pay for it.According to her, she is the one that got me so interested in cars, and she knows I love cars more than anything in the world, so why does she prevent me from doing what I love? Maybe she doesn't want me to waste my money? Well, I don't want anything else...all I want are cars. I don't give a sh*t about anything else!All of my future goals and plans have been destroyed by my mother. So now I'm pissed and pI have no idea what to work towards now.... Please don't lecture me about being just a stupid spoled kid. I understand how lucky I am to have this car, but having an awsome car and not being able to personalize to my own taste is like having 2 million dollars in cash and not being able to spend it on anything...I just needed to tell someone before I blew up with anger...I gues now my plan is to save for a crotch rocket. My dad will take me to buy one when I get the money. He said I can live with him when my mom kicks me out for having a bike.

[Mavrik]

Thats why you marry a car chick and move your (removed) out of your mom's house. sorry thats my best advice.

[Merzbow]

(removed), that's probably the best advice I've ever recieved!

[Stang2Vibe]

Well, considering that he's still 16, he'd have to get his mom's permission to do that too. If she won't let him put grille inserts on the car, I doubt that she'll sign the papers to let him marry a car chick.I do feel for you Merz, my mom was like that too in a lot of ways. The only difference is that she couldn't afford to buy me a car so I had to buy my own and pay my own insurance. Since I bought my cars myself and paid all related expenses, it was hard for her to tell me what I could put on them. But don't feel so down or let it ruin your life or your dreams. You just will have to wait a little while longer until you can do whatever you want with your car than most people do. Just think, you'll have the rest of your life to play around with cars if that's what you want to do.

[Mr. Poopypants]

My advice Merz... If she was nice enough to buy you the car, or whoever was, just listen to them. Yeah, I know, it sucks, but in the long run you will be much better off. And save your money, I've decided that you can mod your car as much as you want but you will still have to eventually get rid of it one way or the other, so I'll do a mod here or there, but other than that, hell with it. Consider yourself lucky that you have parents with the money to buy you a new car at 16, My first car was a dark red 1987 Subaru GL that was a hand me down from my mom, it was beat up and had 125,000 miles on it. Basically what I'm saying, in a roundabout way is, be happy with what you've got.

[scherry2]

your mom bought you a car pays the payment for youyou only make $100 every 2 weeks. your 16your *****ing cause your mom, who owns the car, says your grille inserts are a waste of money.get a better jobbuy your own carpay your own insurancepay your own rentpay for your own food and clothesthen you'll have a reason to complain, when you don't have any money for any modifications.appreciate what you have at your age.

[noginsk]

Quote, originally posted by scherry2 »your mom bought you a car pays the payment for youyou only make $100 every 2 weeks. your 16your *****ing cause your mom, who owns the car, says your grille inserts are a waste of money.get a better jobbuy your own carpay your own insurancepay your own rentpay for your own food and clothesthen you'll have a reason to complain, when you don't have any money for any modifications.Geez! Go easy! He's just venting! I had been dreaming about getting the vibe for a couple of years before I actually got it. My wife and I are basically broke due to school costs and the constant moving with the Military. She still let me get the vibe though. I cannot however, do any modifications to it until it is out of warranty, and then some (although I tend to sneak by on this by doing things she won't see or won't notice...). That said, I am happy to wait till the warranty is up so I can fiddle with it. Having my dream car is such a great feeling in the first place that I can be patient to wait to modify.

[Jahntassa]

Yeah, I know and feel your pain. The day I picked up the Vibe I went out and got a full set of Silverstars. My Mom didn't understand why I would replace something that was working fine.. Then she didn't understand why I would hack the stereo to pieces putting my amp and things in... However, unlike your situation, i'm paying for the whole thing myself.. Sometimes, they just don't understand. It's sad, it's annoying, and it's -very- aggrivating. If you can't swing her to let you put them on (with everything else it seems you have, I can't imagine what her problem would be), then I say just lay low... Either keep them and put them on later, or return them for now, and get 'em again later. Sometimes following the rules sucks, but ya gotta do it.I'm sorry you need to deal with it, though. I hate anticipating something like that, only to be dashed by whatever problems, and it's even worse when there's no outstanding reason why not! (I know she's paying for it, but still, if you say it was her decision, it was her decision.)

[Merzbow]

Ok man I already said don't b*tch about me being a kid and I already said I am extremely happy she bought me a car so lay off. There are barely any jobs availible for a 16 year old since the college kids are coming home, so I cannot get a better job. When I get an actual career, and get more than 5 hours a week I wont have any room to complain.I had $2500 saved and I was about to call a guy about an '88 monte Carlo so I was 3 days away from buying my own car. I've been saving since I was 7 to buy a car. Before I could buy the Monte Carlo my mom bought the Vibe instead and took away my $2500 I had saved, which I don't mind. I would rather have bought my own car because she controls me like a pupet with the Vibe. I take so much pride into my car and to have her give me this and not let me customize it is kind of sh*tty. If it weren't for the Vibe I would have moved in with my dad a long time ago.

[Pablo1669]

dang man, I'm almost 23, I haven't lived at home for 2 years now, I pay for my own car and insurance and my dad still gives me $hit about spending money to upgrade my car.If you really think about it, you're not going to be driving the vibe forever, and I'm sure that once you make good enough money, you'll upgrade your car by getting something newer and faster. In the long run, I'm sure your mom is just trying to help you save money. Today the grill inserts, tomorrow the exhaust, the next thing will be the supercharger... I think she's just stopping the train before it gets the chance to take off.Cars depreciate in value, and modding them out, as much fun as it is at the time, is sort of a bad investment. I know i know, I've modded my car, but when I think back about it, I surely wish I didn't start, because I could do a whole lot more with that money I spent, and I wouldn't have blown my engine due to poor aftermarket parts. (different story, already been told).When I think about all the money I spent on my car, I start to think about all the other stuff I could have bought instead. You are right, you're still young, jobs are hard to find, keep savin that money and get yourself a bike if you really want one, and you'll be happier with that then some cheap grille inserts held on with zip ties.

[drunkenmaxx]

unfortunately merz, your mom is probably afraid of her little boy growing up and that is why she bought you the vibe. my mom was terrified when i moved out and still talks every once in a while about me moving back in. i say the best thing you can do is save up, get your own car, then give her precious vibe back and do whatever you want to your car.

[Charlievibe]

I understand that you are just venting, but let me share this kernel of knowledge with you that a friend of mine shared with me back in HS (I to received a new car at 16 and I also fought with my mom about doing things to the car)....if your name is not on the title and you aren't making any kind of payment on the car, then your mom, who by law is the legal owner of the car, has the absolute, legal right to tell you what you can and can't do to her car. The fact that she lets you drive it exclusively and call it yours is a great thing. If you don't like how your mom is doing things, then my advice is, not to get married, but to move in with your father and let your mom have her car.Don't get me wrong, I do understand getting mad at not being able to do what you want with the money you earn, many of us out here with obligations totally understand that. Someday you will get married (or not) and have responsibilities. You won't always be able to do what you want with your own money and that stinks.

[AKLGT]

well i can understand the disappointment. i remember when i would be waiting and waiting for this hood for my vibe to come... like 3 mos of extreme anticipation! telling everyone about it, showing pictures, etc. but then it never came and found out it was a scam! i was pissed!!!!in a way, it's kinda like that. paul, being young w/o all the worries of life (treasure these times my friend!), ordered this relatively inexpensive and easy mod for "his" car. waiting and waiting for it to arrive like a little kid on christmas morning, only to have mom say, i hate it, you're not keeping it! it sucks royaly, but part of life and growing up. just go w/ the flow. pick your battles worth dying for. trust me, i understand what it's like to be questioned about every little thing you do. i'm 26 and unfortunately live at home for the last 4 yrs since going thru my divorce. by winter, i have plans to move out! had i not spent $4000 last summer on mods for the vibe, i'd have moved out already! just be patient....

[ZubenElGenubi]

Lessee if I can remember when I was 16... Oh, yes, I didn't have a car.My first car wasn't until a year later and it was a 1967 Rambler with mis-matched fenders and no trunk lock. But I paid for it and my parents covered the insurance (I got the better deal there, my friend).Flash forward twenty-something years. I have just bought my VERY FIRST NEW car...a 2004 Vibe. And even though I'm paying for it, my wife still doesn't understand why I want to modify a car that seems perfectly fine! ("Oh yes! Tein coilovers! TRD CAI! Magnaflow Exhaust! I must have them!" )I can sympathize with you a little bit because I'm hearing the same stuff now. However, since your mom is making the car payments...and insurance payments (around $2400/year?), I think you got to cut her a little slack. The fact that she let you put on neon underbodies and paint the engine is pretty cool by my standards.And hold off on the crotch rocket... Wait till your really old and then get a Harley.

[drunkenmaxx]

Quote, originally posted by silverawd26 »This thread is just amazing. Between this one and the Money thread.what u talkin' about willis?want this one deleted also?

[NSimkins]

Quote, originally posted by drunkenvibe »what u talkin' about willis?want this one deleted also?I have no problem with this thread as long as it remains civil.

[AKLGT]

Quote, originally posted by NSimkins »I have no problem with this thread as long as it remains civil. ya, me neither. no flaming or political stuff that i can see... we gonna delete every flippin thread where someone disagrees?

[drunkenmaxx]

i believe the general concensus to be this:yes, it does suck that your mom is being this way about the vibe, but rules are rules and there's nothing you can do.we are here to listen if you need to vent!

[scherry2]

sorry, but I read your rant and think to myself that "you haven't seen nothin yet " and I read the papers about all the divorces and you hear all about kids not listening to thier elders.... and i read your rant and I think your wrong.again I apologize, consider it constructive critisism from an old man.

[Psychobroker]

Quote, originally posted by scherry2 »sorry, but I read your rant and think to myself that "you haven't seen nothin yet " I was about to post the same thing...but I'll suggest this instead:hang your grilles - exactly how they would look on your Vibe - up on your wall immediately opposite your bedroom door (inside your room). Eventually, your mom will get sick of seeing them up there every time she opens your door, and will tell you to install them

[Merzbow]

lol...that's about it right there. Honestly I don't really give a sh*t about them anymore. I put them away so I don't have to look at them until I return them. My mom blames my dad for letting me buy them without being informed of how they look....of course I had to sit there grinding my teeth listening to her call my dad a cheap b*stard and all kinds of obsenities, without punching her in the face. I mean, it's one thing to call him one name but she just keeps at it....ANYWAYS, I gues I lose this battle.I really don't like arguing with my mom anymore, for one reason I wont win so there's no reason, and also because I'll be outa here in a couple of years so it would be best to leave on good terms. So what ever, thanks for the advice everyone, regaurdless of wheather or not it was what I wanted to hear LOL

[AKLGT]

hey paul, no prob. we've all gone thru it w/ the parents and what not. heck! i still do! but soon... very soon! and when you are gone, she will look back and realize it wasn't such a big thing after all! moms have a tendancy to want to control their children no matter what age you are!

[AKLGT]

yes, kissing (removed) is a good way to win brownie points. and telling her you were wrong and she was right is one of the best things moms (and women) love to hear! rob's got a very very good point here. try and win her over w/ sweetness. maybe she'll reconsider or perhaps be willing to look at other grill alternatives.

[Merzbow]

She knew I was ordering them, she took the money out of my bank for them....I don't have access to my own bank account by the way, taht's why I keep a hidden stash in my room. I showed her all the info on the ebay listing...the location, the vendor, the price, the pictures, and she said sure go ahead. My mom is unique, in that I cannot calmly talk to her and get a calm response...she doesn't work like that. She automatically asumes I'm being a smart @$$ kid that thinks I'm hot sh*t. My dad knows exactly how she is and is on my side all the time.Kind of off topic here but this is a really funny story my dad told me. When they were married and about 25yrs old my mom ALLWAYS b*tched at my dad. He said once they were driving in his van and she was screaming at him about something. The traffic light turned red so he slammed on the brakes causing her head to bump the dash board, not hard. Then he got out and walked away down the road. I was laughing pretty hard just picturing it.

[AKLGT]

yes, if they are not returnable then it would be a big waste to let them sit in a box and collect dust.

[Merzbow]

Maybe I should lie to her and say they cannot be returned....nah I wouldn't do that. It's an idea though. it's funny how I get yelled at for the stupidest litle things. She should be glad I've never been in serious trouble with anyone, never been suspended or expelled, never been in a physical fight, I get great grades, don't drink or go to parties. I think that would be a couple good reasons to give me a bit more freedom, but what ever, her car her ules just like you all said...as much as it hurts to say that it is hers since I take so much pride and put so much love into the car, it's true.

[AKLGT]

yes, you don't want to give her a reason to take it away!

[Mr. Poopypants]

Quote, originally posted by Merzbow »Maybe I should lie to her and say they cannot be returned....nah I wouldn't do that. It's an idea though. it's funny how I get yelled at for the stupidest litle things. She should be glad I've never been in serious trouble with anyone, never been suspended or expelled, never been in a physical fight, I get great grades, don't drink or go to parties. I think that would be a couple good reasons to give me a bit more freedom, but what ever, her car her ules just like you all said...as much as it hurts to say that it is hers since I take so much pride and put so much love into the car, it's true.Not to make light of your situation, but.......wait, what the hell am I talking about, of course I'm making light of it and offering you a suggestion all at once, if they are not returnable, post a link to a picture of what they look like, and if I like them, I'll buy them off of you, that should take care of the whole situation.

[noginsk]

Quote, originally posted by Mr. Poopypants »Not to make light of your situation, but.......wait, what the hell am I talking about, of course I'm making light of it and offering you a suggestion all at once, if they are not returnable, post a link to a picture of what they look like, and if I like them, I'll buy them off of you, that should take care of the whole situation.That's a great idea! You might even want to post them in the for sale section too!

[joatmon]

Quote, originally posted by Merzbow » After two weeks of patiently waiting my happiness is shattered by her....All of my future goals and plans have been destroyed by my mother. So now I'm pissed and pI have no idea what to work towards now.... ...I gues now my plan is to save for a crotch rocket. My dad will take me to buy one when I get the money. He said I can live with him when my mom kicks me out for having a bike.... If it weren't for the Vibe I would have moved in with my dad a long time ago.I suppose that for you this is a huge ordeal, but not being able to put a different grill on your car is ridiculously trivial compared to what you will run into later in life.Sounds like your parents had a pretty bitter divorrce, Instead of playing them against each other to see who will buy your affection with the most expensive toys, start working towards an adult relationship with each of them. I'd bet it's not easy for your mom lately, you need to ask yourself if you are helping her or making things worse. Make the most of the time you have with your parents, you never know what will happen tomorrow. Show your mom you care by returning the grills, and use the money to buy her some flowers. That will be worth more happiness in the long run than a replacemennt grill for a car.

[Merzbow]

I dunno...neither of my parents buy me anything except for the car and maybe a couple items of clothing a year, so it's not really a compitition between who buys me toys, I buy myself toys, that's why I bought the grill.I had a "talk" with her the other day and I think she may let me buy a project car instead. Since the car wont be new, it wont matter if I screw up on it I gues is her theory. She said when I get the money we will talk and figure it out. I'm thinking something along the lines of a Nova or old firebird. She's a sucker for classics anyhow so I think I can convince her. Problem solved.She wants my dad's opinion on the grills before I return them, which means there's a possibility I could keep them. Of course then if I do keep them I get the guilt trip, so I may just return them anyways to make her happy.

[scherry2]

there was a song back in '99 called "sunscreen" here are the words.many truths in it. http://display.lyrics.astraweb...creen

[Stang2Vibe]

I remember that song. Always made me think.Anyway, I do see some parental warfare going on here in this situation and I think that it may be contributing to the grille dilemma.Also, I have two friends whose parents got divorced while we were kids. It is incredibly ugly and sad when unhappy couples use their kids as weapons against each other. My one friend actually had to go to court and testify against his own mom because she was making ridiculous and untrue claims against his father. This kind of stuff messes up people for life. That reminds me, I have to get back in touch with him.

[Merzbow]

Yeah. My grandpa had a few words with my mom and told her it's my money so she decided to let me keep them, and also is going to let me buy other things for the car too like a couple subs and exhaust and such.

[futseal04]

Quote, originally posted by ZubenElGenubi »And hold off on the crotch rocket... Wait till your really old and then get a Harley. Actually, you should buy a used crappy dirt bike to learn how to ride. After wrecking a couple of times, you will find out how much it sucks to wreck and won't do anything stupid on the freeway.As far as the car thing goes....I am one of those who paid for everything. My first car was a 1975 Datsun pickup that I paid $500 for. I wrecked it and then bought a 74 Mustang ($900) that was black with no A/C in Oklahoma. MY parents would let me take the cool car out on dates, but that is about it.......IMO, if i had it to do over again, then I would by another clunker and drive it around....even take dates out in it the first time. If she stays with you after a date in the clunker, then she deserves a second date in the Vibe.....

[Merzbow]

Thanks...It looks awsome. I'll post pictures in the exterior forum when my dad sends them to me. (I don't have a digital camera, he does)

[ArcsVibe]

Bro just tell your mom I bought them for you as a gift

[AKLGT]

good to hear it all worked out!

[ArcsVibe]

LOL I was too lazy to read the entire thread Glad it worked out though...but next time use my excuse!

[Merzbow]

(removed) ok. thanks.