Old lady and the bank president mature

[redlava]

In no way am I making fun of Canada, this is the way that it was told to me.One day an old lady went into the Bank of Canada and asked one of the tellers to speak to the bank president. When asked why the lady replied, "Because I have a large sum of money that I want to invest here." The teller went to get the president and a few moments later he appeared. They went back to his office and he asked her how much she wanted to invest. She replied, "$165,000." The bank president said, "That is a lot of money, how did you ever save up that much?" The old woman replied, "By making bets." "What kind of bets?" the president asked. The old lady said, "For example, I bet you $25,000 that your testicles are square." The Bank president started to laugh and told her that she was on because this was a bet that he couldn't lose. The woman stated that because of the size of the bet that she would be back with her lawyer at 10:00 am the next morning to act as a witness. The president say nothing wrong with this, and agreed. Later that night the bank president stood infront of a mirror examining his testicles very carefully, and came up with the conclusion that his testicles could not be mistaken as being square.The next morning at precisely 10 am the old lady came in with her lawyer. The bank president pulled his pants down to his ankles so that the old woman could examine them. The old lady bent over and then asked if she could touch them. Given the large amount of money involved he said yes. As the woman began to examine his testicles he looked up and noticed that the lawyer was banging his head against the wall. He asked her why he was doing that. The old woman replied, "It is probably because I bet him $100,000 that I would be holding the testicles of the President of the Bank of Canadain in my hands around 10 am."

[russ257]

thats a pretty good one

[Mavrik]

HAHAHA!!! reminds me of another joke... not in canada though... I think.Guy walks up to the bartender and says "I'll bet you $300 I can (removed) in that glass while standing over here."Bartender sees how this could be an easy bet as the glass is very far away and agrees to the bet.Well the guy pulls it out and pisses at the glass, over the counter, on the walls, the tables, the floor. Everywhere but the glass. The bartender is very happy to see this and laughs for he is about to make an easy $300 (obviously a US joke as $300 CAD isn't a whole lot) Finally the guy is done and happily hands over $300 to the bartender. The bartender confused by the guy's happiness asks why and is told "Well see those five guys over there? I bet them $500 each that I could (removed) on your floor, (removed) on your tables, (removed) on your counter and (removed) on your walls and not only would you not be angry, you'd be happy about it!"