Valentine's Day Humor

[Jaxy]

HAPPY VALENTINE DAY !!!!! THESE ARE ENTRIES TO A WASHINGTON POST COMPETITIONASKING FOR A RHYME WITH THE MOST ROMANTIC FIRST LINE, BUT THE LEAST ROMANTIC SECOND LINE:~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Love may be beautiful, love may be blissBut I only slept with you, because I was pissed.*************************I thought that I could love no otherUntil, that is, I met your brother.**************************Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's empty and so is your head.**************************Of loving beauty you float with grace, If only you could hide your face.****************************Kind, intelligent, loving and hot, This describes everything you are not.******************************I want to feel your sweet embrace, But don't take that paper bag off of your face.*******************************I love your smile, your face, and your eyes -- Damn, I'm good at telling lies!************************************My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife -- Marrying you screwed up my life.************************************I see your face when I am dreaming, That's why I always wake up screaming.*************************************My love, you take my breath away -- What have you stepped in to smell this way?*************************************My feelings for you no words can tell, Except for maybe "Go To Hell." ************************************* What inspired this amorous rhyme? -- Two parts vodka, one part lime!

[Mavrik]

oh my god I'd get shot saying those lol