Office Buzz Words and Phrases for the 21st Century

[esjones]

Office Buzz Words and Phrases for the 21st Century· BLAMESTORMINGSitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missedor a project failed, and who was responsible.· SEAGULL MANAGERA manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps oneverything, and then leaves.· CHAINSAW CONSULTANTAn outside expert brought in to reduce the employee headcount,leaving the top brass with clean hands.· CUBE FARMAn office filled with cubicles.· MOUSE POTATOThe on-line, wired generation's answer to the couch potato.· PRAIRIE DOGGINGWhen someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, andpeople's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.· SITCOMs(Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage) What yuppiesturn into when they have children and one of them stops workingto stay home with the kids.· STARTER MARRIAGEA short-lived first marriage that ! ends in divorce with no kids,no property and no regrets.· STRESS PUPPYA person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and whiny.· SWIPED OUTAn ATM or credit card that has been rendered useless because themagnetic strip is worn away from extensive use.· TOURISTSPeople who take training classes just to get a vacation fromtheir jobs. "We had three serious students in the class; the restwere just tourists."· TREEWAREHacker slang for documentation or other printed material.· XEROX SUBSIDYEuphemism for swiping free photocopies from one's workplace.· CHIPS & SALSAChips = hardware, Salsa = software. "Well, first we gotta figureout if the problem's in your chips or your salsa."· PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCEThe fine art of whacking the heck out of an electronic device toget it to work again. (Try not to dent the case.)· SALMON DAYThe experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream onlyto get screwed and die in the end.· CLM(Career Limiting Move) Used among microserfs to describe ill-advised activity. Trashing your boss while he or she is withinearshot is a serious CLM.· ADMINISPHEREThe rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rankand file. Decisions that fall from the adminisphere are oftenprofoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they weredesigned to solve.· DILBERTEDTo be exploited and oppressed by your boss. Derived from theexperiences of Dilbert, the geek-in-hell comic strip character."I've been Dilberted again. The old man revised the specs for thefourth time this week."· 404Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error message"404 Not Found," meaning that the requested document could not belocated. "Don't bother asking him ... he's 404, man."

[Mr. Poopypants]

Those are great. I do have a Seagull Boss. I will have to share those with some coworkers.